The Great Pizza Cheat Code
(Or how we “cooked” without really cooking.)
After the bread tragedy, we swore off baking for a while. The emotional scars were real. Every time we passed the oven, we could still hear our mother’s scream. "WHAT IS THAT?!"—a haunting memory of melted Tupperware and shattered dreams.
We decided: No more high-risk baking. At least, not for a while.
And then one day, scrolling through an app (probably looking for something to order, because let’s be honest, trust issues with our own cooking were still strong), we saw it.
👀 Pizza Base – Ready to Use
👀 Pizza Sauce – Just Spread and Bake
👀 Toppings – Your choice
And an idea struck.
Were we about to become pizza chefs?
Absolutely.
The Smartest Cooking Hack of All Time
Now, when you hear "pizza," you probably imagine:
- Dough making.
- Kneading for hours.
- Fancy sauce preparation.
- Dough spinning in the air (which, let’s be real, we would have never pulled off).
But we? We found a loophole.
Step 1️⃣: Ordered everything.
- Pizza base? ✅
- Sauce? ✅
- Toppings? ✅
- Veggies? ✅
Step 2️⃣: Assembled it all like a Pinterest board.
- Onions, capsicum, paneer, sweet corn, jalapeño—all artistically arranged because we are chefs, okay?
Step 3️⃣: Set the oven to "Pizza Mode."
- The first two? Slightly burnt.
- Lesson learned: Oven settings don’t make you a pro. They are for pros.
The ‘Almost Disaster’ Moment
After two slightly charred pizzas, we were finally getting the hang of it. But of course, it wouldn't be our kitchen without at least one minor catastrophe.
At one point, we got too confident and decided to experiment.
“Let’s add extra cheese.”
Sounds innocent, right? Until we pulled the pizza out and saw:
The cheese had melted everywhere—dripping off the edges, burning at the bottom of the oven, and forming an artistic (read: chaotic) mess.
Mom entered, took one look, sighed, and walked away.
She had seen too much.
The Final Verdict
After tweaking the time and temperature (and agreeing to stop overflowing the pizza with cheese), the results? Perfection.
Did we really cook? Not exactly.
Did we still feel like MasterChefs? Absolutely.
Did we start eating pizza three times a week? You bet.
The Moral of the Story?
Sometimes, the smartest way to cook is to not really cook at all. 😉
Pizza-making is an art, not just a recipe. The way you place your toppings? Skill. The way you bake it just right? Talent. The way you make it every other day because it’s foolproof? Genius.
And that, my friends, is how we became pro pizza chefs without making a single pizza from scratch. 🎉🍕
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