The Great Burger Experiment: Bread Fears & Patty Tears

 

The Great Burger Experiment: Bread Fears & Patty Tears

After our tragic, heart-wrenching, soul-scarring "Bread Disaster" (RIP melted Tupperware, we miss you), we made a sacred vow: Never. Touch. Bread. Again.

But that didn't mean we were about to give up on burgers—oh no, my friend. That would be a crime against food.

So, like the brave but slightly traumatized home chefs we were, we found a loophole. Buy the buns. Make everything else. Genius, right? A perfect balance of effort and safety.

And thus, The Great Burger Experiment began.

Step 1: The Strategic Planning (a.k.a Overthinking Everything)

Before even touching a single vegetable, we did what we do best: YouTube marathons.
7-8 videos. Minimum. Because if you don’t obsessively overprepare, did you even cook? To us... NO!!!!

Then came The List:

✔️ Burger buns (Store-bought.)
✔️ Veggies (Onions, tomatoes, lettuce, capsicum—because health).
✔️ Cheese slices (The real hero).
✔️ Mayo & ketchup (Duh).
✔️ Spices (because bland food is a crime).
✔️ Potatoes (for the patty, obviously).

Once Delivery Bhai arrived (our unofficial best friend at this point), we were ready for battle.

Or so we thought.

Step 2: The War of the Patty

Everything started fine. We boiled the potatoes, mashed them like pros, and mixed them with spices. So far, no casualties. A rare moment of peace in our kitchen.

Then came The Frying.

Now, frying a patty should be simple, right? Coat it in breadcrumbs, gently place it in hot oil, wait for golden perfection.

HAHAHA. No.

The moment the patty touched the oil—SPLAT! Oil erupted like a volcano. My brother and I? Dodging hot oil like action heroes. Arms flailing. Screaming. Running for our lives.

Me: “WHY IS IT ATTACKING US?!”
Brother: “SAVE THE PATTY!”
Patty: Casually disintegrating into an unrecognizable mess.

It was chaos. Pure chaos. The first patty was lost. A martyr.

But we don’t quit. Oh no. We adapt.

For round two, we adjusted the oil temperature, threw a tiny piece of potato in to test (like real chefs), and finally—a perfect, crispy, golden-brown patty emerged.

Victory never tasted so good.

Step 3: The Art of Burger Assembly

With the hardest part done, it was time to stack this beauty up.

Bun → Mayo → Lettuce → Patty → Cheese → Tomato → Ketchup → Bun.

Sounds easy? No. Because someone (not naming names, but it was me) forgot to toast the buns.

So, mid-assembly, we threw the buns on a pan and ended up burning the edges.

At this point, we had two choices:

1. Start over.
2. Cover the evidence with extra cheese.

Obviously, we chose option 2. 😎

Step 4: The First Bite (a.k.a Redemption Arc)

After battling oil eruptions, burned buns, and emotional damage, we finally took a bite.

And you know what?

🔥 IT. WAS. GLORIOUS. 🔥

Crispy patty. Melty cheese. Just the right amount of spice. Sure, the buns were slightly charred, but who cares? Perfection is overrated.

We looked at each other, nodded like judges in a food show, and declared:

"YUMMMMMMYYYYY!!!!!!"

Because if you survive frying disasters and kitchen warzones, and still eat the food? It’s a win. 🎉

Final Thoughts:

✔️ We still won’t bake bread. Nope. Not happening.
✔️ We are now burger experts.
✔️ Will we try chicken burgers next? Maaaybe. (Depends on how much therapy- a long break we need after this.)

Until then—Burger Night, every week? ABSOLUTELY. 🍔🔥